Never confess your feelings

Couples embracing, Pic: Google images

A few years back I was one of the frustrated guys that didn’t understand how can I do all the right moves, say all the nicest things to girls but still not get the girl in the end; then end up falling to the dreaded friend-zone that has made a lot of brothers develop what I like to call, ‘gay tendencies’. I could not get the girls that I really liked, but had all the luck with girls that I wasn’t attracted to. It came to a point where I almost thought there was something wrong with me; especially when a girl that I dated dumped me for telling her I love her and showing her affection.

 As my confident plumaged and my self-esteem dipped, I start asking myself why is it that all the girls that I’m NOT interested in like me so much? Why is it when I start liking those girls that I wasn’t interested in initially, all of a sudden they all run? After a long conversation with myself and 4 beers later it finally hit me, I finally realised that if I talk with a girl that I don’t like I don’t think too much about what I’m about to say and try to make it sound better, I don’t convey messages that show her I’m interested in her, and finally I realised that I can practically say anything to a broad that I’m not attracted to and actually get away with it and worse, the broad will actually like the crap I just said about her in her face and want to have my babies.

After making that realisation, I started observing social behaviors. I watched the guys that I knew were successful with women and scored all the hottest girl in the neighborhood. To my surprise, my little observational research revealed that the guys that where chicks magnet actually showed no affection to their girls what so ever, this discovery that I have just made didn’t make sense to me. I ended up convincing myself that I should actually go and ask my neighbor Bongani how he does it because he was getting more action that a Rambo movie, now Bongani was no ordinary chick magnet. He was the ultimate Casanova, I’m talking about he was the one putting girls on the friend-zone, girls that where my dream girls at the time. That is why he earned the name Master bongs, which I use, referring to him.

What he told me was that, the worst advice I can get about getting a girl is when someone tells me to be myself. He also said girls believe they want one thing and quite frankly they are looking for the quite opposite of what they say they want. The words he told me that day opened my eyes and made me see the dating game differently.

 I realised that girls from my class, in the movies, basically all the girls in general always say that they want prince charming, a real gentlemen, a dude that will be a shoulder to cry on, open doors, and a guy that will listen, basically a guy that you will read about in all the romantic novels. But when I look at their boyfriends, I saw they are none of that, they are total jerk asses that don’t care about anyone else but themselves, and their penis of course. In fact, I remembered asking myself years ago, before I even had a chat with the great one, Master Bongs. What is it that these girls see in these jerks they dating because what these guys do is treat them like crap.

The master told me that he is not immune to love, what he does is when he sees that he is starting to catch feelings, he don’t walk away, but he runs away and never calls again to avoid heart ache. OK I’m quite against that advice because I believe we should give love a chance. Anyway, that’s when I started changing my approach, buy that I mean I became less affectionate, I didn’t talk about my feelings, I made sure that I don’t show a girl that I love her even when I am deeply in love. I’d walk away even when my heart wanted me to stay. All of that didn’t make any sense to me, but to the females it was magic. In parties when we all drunk I acted like sex is the last thing on my mind and that actually made me more desirable to them female.

Now what I’m basically trying to say to all you niggaz out there, never talk about feelings to girls or be emotionally attached unless you truly sure that the feeling you have towards that particular girl is mutual, because if you do you are shooting yourself in the leg. All these things that I have talked about which are not logical work like a charm to females and it’s what they like for some reason that is still beyond my comprehension. Now I’m not saying all broads are like that, but I’m saying most of them are like that. So have fun and stay pimping, never confess your feelings too early in the game unless you planning on marrying the girl. Show love but not too much, be romantic in your own right not the way they do it in romantic movies and your girl will love you forever. 

Is advertising not in sync with reality?

Calif. Milk Board Yanks Controversial PMS Ad Campaign (Google images)

Advertising agencies know that consumers prefer entertainment than facts, that is why they concentrate their adverts on entertainment to catch the interest of the consumers and make consumers relate to the products that their promoting. Advertisers know that the only way to appeal to consumers is through entertainment and less facts and information about the product its-self. However, there are disadvantages when agencies dwell on entertainment and forget about the facts and information about the products they are representing. Misunderstanding will occur, because the adverts will contain less information about the product being advertised, sometimes consumers won’t understand what the advert is trying to convey to them - the actual message of the advert - because it contains less information about the product. Consumers only watch the advert for their own enjoyment; not for understanding what is being said about the product.

Advertisers should focus their adverts on giving more information about what is being advertised and have little bit of entertainment, to capture the attention of consumers. They must also give rational reason for consumers to purchase what’s being advertised, unlike making adverts that are not meaningful and won’t benefit consumers, for example, being chased by twenty women, because of a certain deodorant that you used that morning.

It is point-less spending millions of rands on communication message that is not understood by all, or worse people watch the advert for enjoyment because the ad contains more entertainment than the facts about the product and in the end they still don’t understand the message.

According to an article posted on news 24, by Tony Koenderman, in October 28, 2010 Mike Abel from M&CSaatchi, identifies five articles of faith about the modern consumer: people seek value, they trust you more if they like you, they like consistency, they want self-belief and conviction from us, and they need to be loved, understood and respected.

Sometimes agencies use this article of faith about the modern consumer to their advantage, in some cases in a good way by giving consumers value for their money, trust, consistency, love, respect etc… and in some cases advertises use the articles of faith about the modern consumer, to manipulate consumers.  It is also evident that advertisers use the mass media to manipulate or mislead consumers by exaggerating the facts about the product to give it that dramatic effect and to make consumers see the product as the best than other products that are in competition with the one advertised.